This morning I was listening to the radio on my drive to work, and they were having people call in and talk about that “person in their lives” that “everyone has” that is a “Debbie Downer”. All of this got me to thinking – I don’t know that anyone in my life is a Debbie Downer. Does this mean that the Debbie Downer is me? I mean, I do complain about my pain quite a bit. Perhaps I should just put on my big girl panties and stop my bitching. My mother would tell me that this is the best course. Just pretend everything is ok until it really is. I could go to my doctor’s appointments and do what I need to do in order to find the root of the problem, but I could keep it to myself. Others don’t need to know my life story. Others don’t need to know what I’m going through. Others don’t need details about what’s wrong. Just put on a happy face for everyone, and then it’ll almost be like everything really is ok. I don’t know. It’s a thought. I actually kind of like it. I’ve never been very good at keeping my emotions bottled in. I’ve always “worn my emotions on my sleeve” so to speak. But I think that with a bit of practice I could do it. I am an actress after all.
Speaking of acting. I had rehearsals that went amazing last night. I feel like I might finally be finding the angst required to play my character. I have no problem finding the angst, but I have a problem finding it and using it on cue. I usually dredge it up about the time the short play is over. I have to figure out a way to bring it forth a bit earlier in the show. My other play that I’m in has rehearsals tonight. I’m working on learning my lines still for it, but hopefully all will go well.
I hope things are going well for all of you. I’ve been reading the Song of Fire and Ice series, and it’s pretty awesome. I’m on book 3, and I have no idea how many books there are, but it’s really good. (This is the series that Game of Thrones comes from, by the way). In any case, I should probably look like I’m working a bit harder, so I guess I’ll write more later.